In the era of the “Me Too” movement, businesses are reevaluating their policies on workplace relationships. The movement, which gained momentum after the Harvey Weinstein allegations came to light, has sparked conversations about the prevalence of sexual assault and harassment in professional settings. This has raised questions about whether office romances are acceptable, and if so, what rules should be in place.
While completely banning workplace dating is impractical, it’s important for companies to establish guidelines to ensure that office romances don’t lead to legal troubles, decreased productivity, or workplace tension. Patti Stanger, a well-known dating expert, believes that companies should offer a “Modern Day Courtship Class” to educate employees about the do’s and don’ts of office relationships.
Here are six essential rules to help employees navigate office romances:
1. Determine the motivation behind an invitation
When considering an invitation from a coworker, it’s crucial to uncover their intentions. Are they looking to advance their career, seeking a casual fling, or genuinely interested in a relationship? Open and honest communication about expectations is vital to make an informed decision.
2. Evaluate how coworkers will perceive the relationship
Consider how your colleagues might react to your office romance. Be prepared for potential gossip and opinions about your relationship. Discuss the situation with your HR department to ensure transparency and address any concerns.
3. Follow appropriate office behavior guidelines
Maintain professionalism at work and focus on your tasks. Avoid public displays of affection, flirting during breaks, or using company resources for personal communication. Keep your personal and professional life separate.
4. Stick to your professional goals
Don’t let your office romance affect your work performance. Maintain your professionalism, stick to your job responsibilities, and continue networking with other coworkers. Using company email or resources for personal matters is a no-go.
Related: Love at Work: Can you legally ban office romances?
5. Establish rules to balance work and personal life
To ensure a healthy work-life balance, set boundaries for discussing work outside office hours. Ideally, work in different departments to avoid direct competition or reporting relationships. This separation can help you manage your personal and professional lives effectively.
6. Stay calm if the relationship ends
Not all office romances lead to lasting love. If a relationship ends, follow these steps:
- Keep the details private and avoid discussing the breakup with coworkers.
- Focus on your job, maintain productivity, and seek professional help if needed.
- Minimize contact with your ex at work.
- Refrain from trying to make your ex jealous or interfere with their career.
- Uphold your ethics, and avoid sending hostile emails or attempting to damage your ex’s career.
- Seek assistance from HR if you face threats or harassment after the breakup.
- Pursue outside activities and hobbies to create positive new habits.
Successful office romances can coexist with maintaining professionalism and work integrity, even after they end. Clear and honest communication from the beginning is the key to creating a safe and productive workplace. As you contemplate a Valentine’s Day dinner or drinks with a colleague, remember that it’s essential to have an open conversation about the direction of your relationship. Feeling secure in your workplace is paramount, as Patti Stanger wisely advises.